Some good limericks (unoriginal)

There was a young man from Japan

Whose limericks never would scan.

When asked why this was,

He answered 'because

I always try to fit as many syllables into the last line as ever possibly I can.

A limerick fan from Australia

Regarded his work as a failure:

His verses were fine

Until the fourth line.

There once was a man from the sticks

Who liked to compose limericks.

But he failed at the sport,

For he wrote 'em too short.

This is taken a stage further by this pair of verses:

There was a young man of Arnoux

Whose limericks stopped at line two

...and by extension...

There was a young man of Verdun

...which if completed would be a self-contradiction.

A third example would be the limerick about the young man from Saint Paul, which would be self-contradictory if it were told at all.

Some proper ones:

A minor league pitcher, McDowell

Pitched an egg at a batter named Owl.

They cried "Get a hit!"

But it hatched in the mitt

And the umpire called it a fowl.

There once was a man dressed in black

His victims he stretched on a rack

With their every breath

Right up 'till their death

They begged him to give them some slack.

And the traditional ones:

There was a fair maiden of Exeter,

So pretty that guys craned their necks at her.

One was even so brave

as to take out and wave

The distinguishing mark of his sex at her.

On the breast of a barmaid named Gail,

Were tattoo'd the prices of ale.

And on her behind,

for the sake of the blind,

was the same, but written in Braille.

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_%28poetry%29

Thank you Wikipedia!